At my 12-week OB appointment today, I got to hear the Olive Shoot’s heartbeat again, thumping away in the 160s. What a lovely sound, that rapid “whoosh, whoosh, whoosh.” I met briefly with the doctor, but we didn’t chat too long, because I didn’t really have any questions. The doctor seemed surprised and kept saying, “Really? No questions? Come on, you’ve got to have something!” What sorts of questions should I be asking? I’m just so delighted to have the Olive Shoot, and so far at my appointments I can’t think of much beyond, “Thank you, Lord! The baby’s doing well!”
As I’m nearly done with the first trimester, it occurs to me that I ought to start planning to actually have a baby. Obvious, I know. But for the past four years, I’ve actively avoided daydreams about pregnancy, nurseries and newborns, because those thoughts brought on too deep an ache. It’s hard to break those habits. It’s strange to realize that now I should think about those matters and start to prepare. We’ll need a nursery, a birthing plan, and a lot of other things that probably haven’t dawned on me yet. How bewildering, and how blessedly wonderful!