Last night, we had a very encouraging care group meeting. We each answered the question, “How have you seen the Lord at work transforming your heart over the past nine or so months, and what means (circumstances, people, etc.) has he used to do so?” As I thought about how to best summarize the work God has done in me in the past year, these words from Isaiah 26:3 came to mind.
You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.
I spent a lot of time last year seeking to stay my mind on the Lord by studying his character. (To direct my study, I used Bible Doctrine by Wayne Grudem and Knowing God by J.I. Packer – very helpful and inspiring materials!) Studying God’s character developed a greater personal trust in him. As turbulent circumstances continued to unroll – failed IVFs, changing doctors and diagnoses, a wretched HSG, the laparoscopy, etc. – I experienced a degree of steadfast peace that persisted through everything. I still felt (and feel) sorrow, fear, anxiety, but confidence in the Lord’s promised goodness predominates. When I receive bad news or encounter disappointment, my soul now rebounds to God’s truth much quicker than it once did. By fixing my attention on the Savior, I find that gratitude for the gospel softens and sweetens any sharp pangs of affliction. This is all a work of God’s grace! I can still hardly believe that satisfaction in Christ and ongoing infertility can coexist in my life. It’s not perfect, of course, but peace is abidingly present.
How about you? How has the Lord done his transforming work in your heart in recent months?